Hotter Than The Sun Mail.com

Apologies to all spammers who might have emailed me over the last four weeks: Because I didn’t check my Hotmail account for 30 days, Microsoft mercilessly nuked it. All contacts and messages from Nigerian Bank Presidents, Norton Systemworks resellers, doctors prescribing growth hormones, and bandits revealing the secrets of online marketing for just $1, have been lost to the void. As have all my porn links.

If you sent me something and a reply wasn’t forthcoming, now you know why…
Nobby underscore Dobscrub at hotmail dot com is reactivated.


Looking Sheepish

I bought myself a real bargain at the weekend: A sheepskin deerstalker-style hat with fold-down ear protectors for just £6.99 in the Gap sale. I look a complete dork in it, but it is incredibly warm. I shall wear it to the football this evening and laugh in the face of icy cold gales that are due to hit. It is another chalk mark on the “I am getting old” board: I am prepared to sacrifice what I look like for comfort and warmth.

I also managed to pick up some matching gloves too.

Unlike my woollen gloves – that make no sound – the sheepskin makes a satisfying “whoompf!” noise when clapped together, so I shall have no problems clapping the heroic performance of Oxford United this evening.

Side story: My sheepskin hat won’t be the stupidest hat ever worn by a member of my family at a football match. A few years back my dad wore an Oxford United cap complete with giant yellow horns to a televised game. The cameras – as they always do when someone looks like a twit – picked him out from the crowd and his ridiculous headwear was seen by the nation.

What is really interesting about the hat is the fact it was owned by Robert Maxwell: Mrs. Maxwell dropped it into and charity shop after her husband’s death, and my mum purchased it for all of 20p.

It’s probably worth a fortune on ebay.


GTA: Vice City Update

After finally nailing the psycho – a 7’ tall rugby player in drag / Baby Spice clone - who was threatening to wipe out my rock band Lovefist, my in game character retired to the local pizza joint. Who should walk in but Michael Jackson in full Thriller album get-up!

He even did a moonwalk when I pointed my gun at him. Unfortunately I then pressed the wrong button and accidentally shot him dead before I’d fully appreciated who he was.

“Eee-Ow!”

I am hoping Michael randomly spawns again soon. Jokes on a postcard please.